St. Louis Rams Free Agent Report Card - A Guest Article for SBNation

 The St. Louis Rams hit the free agent market harder than I would have thought, given their small-ish salary cap situation. But with some free agents testing the market for their services, and strategic players being released, they gained the money needed to have a wild - for the Rams - shopping spree.
  In the lead up to the first day of free agency, not many fans really know what their teams have on their needs lists. The same held true for Rams fans, and it turned out a tight end was at the top of head coach Jeff Fisher's wish list. They've taken a stab at the safety position too, but I'm not sure they've found the right guy yet. Let's assume for the sake of this article that Miami offensive tackle Jake Long is signed by the Rams. taking this into account, I'm going to rate St. Louis' 2013 free agent class so far;

Jake Long, OT - This is one of those signings that will be incredibly great, or cause for lynching parties to form by mid-season. Jake Long came into the NFL as a #1 overall draft pick in 2008 by the Miami Dolphins. He's had a terrific career, but in the last few seasons he's begun to show the wear. I've been reminded by a few that his record for missed games due to injury is impressively small. Great, but let's not forget however well he's played through pain in the first few years of his career, he's an NFL offensive lineman. They get beat up by huge defensive ends, tackles and linebackers. It take a toll. Early last season I had the chance to read some of the Dolphin fans' thoughts in a few comment threads at "the Phinsider". What I remember most is how they ganged up on Long for being injured? Really? here's a look at his games played stats. What do you think?

courtesy of NFL.com

OFFENSIVE LINE
Year	Team	G	GS
2012	Miami Dolphins	12	12
2011	Miami Dolphins	14	14
2010	Miami Dolphins	16	16
2009	Miami Dolphins	16	16
2008	Miami Dolphins	16	16
TOTAL		74	74

For three straight years he played every game, but in 2011 and '12 he missed a total of 6 games. While this isn't evidence of a possible decline in his ability or durability, I'm sure this small trend is why his medical check with the St. Louis Rams took the entire day on Wednesday. Twitter mentions said he was put through his paces by the Rams' training staff, and this may have to do with testing his strength after tearing his Triceps muscle last season.  The bottom line here is the only red flag I can find on his signing is his health, or possible lack of it. The Rams have been cursed by offensive line injuries, so I'm a bit shocked Jeff Fisher and Les Snead opted for a veteran linemen, and not staying with the evident trend of building through the NFL Draft. All in all, there's risked inherent with any free agent signing. The Rams' needs on the offensive line aren't a secret. Kudos to the Rams' front office for their aggressive approach to solving the problem. I give this acquisition a solid: B+

Jared Cook, TE - This one kind of puzzled me. Don't get me wrong, I think the rams can use as many offensive weapons as they can afford. But the amount of money thrown at Cook - $35.1 million, for 5 years/$16 million guaranteed - seemed really, well... HUGE? This isn't a guy who ranked at the top of tight end ranking last season, and has been known to drop a pass on occasion. I love his skill set, with his ability to to compete as a wide receiver as well as Tight end. He's shown a talent for highlight reel catches too. The third round pick out of South Carolina in 2009 doesn't have one of those "Wow!" stat lines either. Let's take a look courtesy of NFL.com.

RECEIVING
Year	Team	G	Rec	Yds	Avg	Yds/G	Lng	TD	20+	40+	1st	FUM
2012	Tennessee Titans	13	44	523	11.9	40.2	61T	4	8	1	24	1
2011	Tennessee Titans	16	49	759	15.5	47.4	80T	3	11	2	34	2
2010	Tennessee Titans	16	29	361	12.4	22.6	36	1	6	0	18	0
2009	Tennessee Titans	14	9	74	8.2	5.3	17	0	0	0	5	0
TOTAL		59	131	1,717	13.1	29.1	80	8	25	3	81	3

The most impressive statistic for Cook is his yards after catch. Combines with his size - 6'5", 348 lbs. - as well a 4.4-ish speed, he offers a unique skills package the rams' offensive coordinator, Brian Schottenheimer, could really take advantage on in the NFC West. This is a guy who matches up well against the hyper-sized defensive backs their division rivals now employ. I give this acquisition a solid: B+

William Hayes, DT/DE - Is re-signing a player, who took a flyer at free agency, worth acknowledgement as a signing? I think it is. Hayes was an enormous part of the Rams defensive success in 2012. He register 7 sacks, but more importantly became a key player who could move among the defensive line positions and excel as he did so.


Courtesy of NFL.com

CAREER STATSMORE
Season	Team			Tackles					Interceptions						Fumbles
		G	GS	Comb	Total	Ast	Sck	SFTY	PDef	Int	Yds	Avg	Lng	TDs	FF
2012	St. Louis Rams	16	0	35	29	6	7.0	--	1	--	--	0.0	--	--	0
2011	Tennessee Titans	10	1	16	11	5	1.5	--	0	--	--	0.0	--	--	0
2010	Tennessee Titans	14	0	32	25	7	1.5	--	0	--	--	0.0	--	--	1
2009	Tennessee Titans	16	11	51	31	20	4.0	--	0	--	--	0.0	--	--	2
2008	Tennessee Titans	8	0	13	10	3	1.0	--	1	--	--	0.0	--	--	1
TOTAL				147	106	41	15.0	0	2	0	0	--	0	0	4

His new contract seems down right affordable by NFL standards - 3 years, $10.5 million, $3.75 million of it in a signing bonus. "Cap friendly" is a term that comes to mind. The 4th round pick in 2008 out of Winston-Salem State is small by most NFL defensive end standards. At 6'3", 273 lbs, he's shown an ability only Jeff Fisher - who drafted him for the Tennessee Titans - would know is there. To me, these are the guys who take a defense from being an also-ran, to greatness. These are the kind of guys the Pittsburgh Steelers have made their stock in trade for years - small school, huge ceiling players with zero fear on the football field. I give this re-acquisition a big time: A

Norb Vonnegut Strikes Again! 146 Pages of Pure Adrenaline

My only question for my friend Norb Vonnegut is "Why do you have to be so damn good at everything?" I still haven't forgiven him for the "Money Porn Beach read" line from his last novel. Actually, I have forgiven him but don't tell . Having the ability to show him The Novel Road now comes up when anyone "researches" beach porn because of my site's high traffic still cracks me up, and makes him feel more than a little guilty. 

 Geesh! Three bestselling financial thrillers later, my East Coast buddy decides it isn't not enough. So he decided to keep tempting us with a short yarn that's available at Barnes and Noble and Amazon as a $1.99 download.

 Here's few excerpts from "The President" :

"If anybody can sell 715,000 units of a product with no redeemable value, it’s a marketing professor from Harvard Business School. In all fairness Keith had started with a formidable asset, the name recognition of Marshall Draper. But give me a break. "Got Excellence" sucked."

"Most of the time, Drayton and I drank Jim Beam on his Boston Whaler. I don’t particularly care for bourbon, but it seemed the right choice as we explored the marshy creeks snaking through his 300-acre estate. There’s nothing like the smell of oyster banks at low tide to make me forget the trading floors, nothing like the stiff-legged egrets and the occasional alligator or two to erase all my thoughts of New York City."

"The morning research call had ended. The floor was buzzing with the sound and fury of 148 idiots in action. And I was thinking, Hat tip to Shakespeare. He understood stockbrokers and the whole business of “signifying nothing” long before we were invented."

So if your looking for a short, 146 page, fast paced read, Norb Vonnegut has what you need. Hell, when this hits the top of the e-book charts, it's quite possible The Novel Road will be the top search site for both "Beach Porn" and "The President"...

                                            

America's Next Author - Social Writing Contest

America's Next Author - Social Writing Contest  Have a story swirling around in your head? I just entered this contest, so pop on over and give my piece a quick read. Throwing in a great review will guarantee you at least one moment of happiness! Enjoy!

An Interview with Me? No Frickin' Way! OK, it happened...

Every now and then I do Blog interviews for people I like. I met a nice young lady over a Bookblogs.com who had recently launched her site. While I'm normally the one interviewing people, it's kind of fun to be on the other side of the questions every now and then. Here are a few excerpts from the interview by Catalina:

You are very diverse. Your blog “The Novel Road” has great interviews and views, and your new novel - Devin Briar is getting fabulous reviews. You have great short stories like Front Office Fiction that have a good following too. What do you as a writer enjoy writing the most?

First, I’d like to thank you for having me as your guest. As a long time, and moderately successful blogger, I see great things in store for your site.

All writing is fun to me. Short stories are a great way to purge my writer’s imagination. Some of the best writing experiences I’ve had writing were on dares. I wrote a Front Office Fiction (The Lighter Side of Seeing “Red”) once when a reader dared me to include “Red” from “The 70s Show” and a line from South Park. I suddenly felt the need to “Kill Kenny” and knew I could somehow fit in the words “dumb ass”... Read the full answer here

You’re quick to respond to comments by your readers. I think that’s important and it creates more of a following. Which social media tools have served you best?

The single most powerful tool anyone using social media has right now is “Tagging”. Get great at tagging your articles or Tweets. Search engines are driven by “tags” now more than ever. Get great at defining words for your articles or books. For instance, tags for my answer to this question could be: wordy, Twitter-hater, blah-blah, and Ding-Dong… Ding-Dong always gets hits! lol... Read the full answer here

Things you’ve written that make you smile? 

   I love to write humor. Yet, in my novel Devin Briar, I found the scenes where Devin and Robin sitting on the couch in their house the best writing moments. There’s something about how the two interact that makes me smile every time I read a segment of my book. They are also the most asked for segments at book readings, which really makes me smile... Read the full answer here

St. Louis Rams: The Game Day Gambit

This is a guest post I wrote for my friend Will Horton at RamsHerd.com

  Try! I’m known for trying to do almost anything when it comes to the St. Louis Rams. In doing so, I’ve learned a great deal. For instance, Photoshop doesn’t really capture the majesty of a Rams game ticket, or at least that’s what the guys at the stadium entrance have told me on more than one occasion… Call it Kismet or Karma, I’m left with tailgating in the parking lot of the Edward Jones Dome most Sundays, though the quick chats with law enforcement before I’m politely escorted away after presenting my current ticket “masterpiece” have become kind of a ritual…

 “So you actually paid a guy for this?” The nice St. Louis policeman waved the ticket I’d tried to use in my face.

 “Yup! I paid a guy named Will Horton…He’s over there somewhere,” I pointed vaguely off in several directions. The policeman’s rookie partner followed the wavering line of my pointing hand. “You should go find him. When I left he was selling tickets to a bus load of Nuns… Can I get a refund for my ticket?”

 The veteran cop elbowed his newbie partner who was still scanning the crowd for the now infamous “Will”.  “You want a refund for this?” He rolled his eye, “This ticket is worse than the last time you tried this…” He pointed at a few minor glitches in the ticket’s appearance. “…For instance, most tickets have the name of the opposing team printed on them?”

 I took a quick look at the ticket he held two inches in front of my face. It said, “St. Louis Rams vs. THEM. I don’t see a problem,“ I replied. All opposing teams are “THEM”, aren’t they?

 “Then there’s the ticket price,” He forced himself not to smile. The stadium officials had caught this nut case at every home game for the last ten years. It had become a minor tradition at the Dome, and his picture was posted at every entrance. Over the years, even the police department had started a small betting pool on what this whack job from New Mexico would come up with next. They’d stopped arresting him a few years ago. His forged tickets were now part of a commemorative mural somewhere inside the Dome.

 I studied the ticket price, which seemed fair since I’d planned on prime seating. “Yeah, who do I talk to about ticket prices? They’re getting a little steep, don’t you think?” I fixed my face with a “concerned consumer” look.

 The rookie glanced at the ticket and gasped, “$11-dee jillion?” He looked at me, then wistfully at the front doors to the Dome. This earned him another elbow in the ribs from his partner.

 “Yup! It’s gettin’ a little steep if you ask me… and that doesn’t include parking. But I’m a fan, so… Aboutthat refund?” I felt sweat begin to trickle down my back.

 “Well, according to you, you get a lot for your eleven-dee jillion bucks. Your ticket says you’re seated in Stan Kroenke’s suite with ten cheerleaders? It also has something about calling plays?” The struggle not to laugh was made worse by the arrival of more officers. They’d heard the call go out that their fellow officer had won the pool by catching the guy who’d become known as “Ticket Dummy”.

 “Call me crazy,” I said. I wondered why the growing numbers of officers were all nodding their heads. “But when I attend games, I want the full experience.” I pointed at the ticket’s addition information on the back of the ticket. “You forgot to mention the sideline Jacuzzi and unlimited beer.” I nodded with satisfaction, “Game stress management like that is worth every penny, don’t you think? Plus, the play calling thing just makes the game special, am I right?” My nodding head was on a swivel now as I searched for an ally in the group of officers. I counted twenty now, and I could see a few police cars, with their lights flashing, screaming toward my little group.

 The officer tapped the ticket on his other hand as he considered what to do next. “Where are you parked? He asked, though he’d heard an officer on his chest mounted mike say, “I found it! It’s in the same spot as last year…”

 Damn! They’d found my Yugo! “I’d be glad to show you gentlemen. If you’ll follow me…” He grabbed my shirt collar as I tried to make a half step dash to freedom.

 He couldn’t keep the smile of his face any longer. He knew this guy was harmless enough, plus if he’d brought with him what he had in the past… “OK, let’s go. Did you bring the shredded green chili chicken or the Carne Asada this time?”

 “Both, plus I have a new low calorie option for those straining against the pistol belts…” I gave his stomach a light back hand slap, then broke through the now laughing crowd of policemen as they teased their friend. I began the long walk to my car, half the St. Louis Police Department in my wake. I glance over my shoulder at the Edward Jones Dome. I could hear the announcer introducing the Rams’ players. “We need to hurry guys!” I yelled at my law enforcement entourage. “It’ll take me a few minutes to set up the TV dish.” I broke into a run toward my trusty Yugo.

 The rookie looked at his partner, “Isn’t the game blacked out here?”

 His partner nodded, along with the rest of the officers who were all smiling now. “Why do you think we don’t arrest him every year?” The rookie shrugged. This earned him a light slap to the back of his head by the senior cop. “It’s because as bad as he is at forging a game ticket, he’s a freakin’ wizard at pirating a game signal. He has a 50” plasma screen TV in his car. Plus, the guy knows how to cook great Mexican food.” All the other officers in the group started nodding their heads at the mention of food. Then one by one, they all began to sprint toward the rusty Yugo in the far corner of the Edward Jones parking lot…

 I'd like to thank Will Horton for allowing me to pop in at RamsHerd.  I'm assuming you all know I'm the    author of  - Devin Briar. It's available at Amazon in paperback and Kindle, Barnes & NobleApple iBookstore and iTunes, Smashword.com, and any other site where great books can be found. To all who've bought my book, know how much I appreciate your support!

In a World Gone Mad! - Great Reader Reviews for Devin Briar

It's not like I'm fearing for the world's literacy and taste, but people have been reading my book, and actually like it... Hmm? Maybe it has to do with the whole Mayan Calendar thing, or melting polar ice caps? Then again, maybe there are people out there who just want to laugh when they read... I have to admit, when I'm reading a book and come across a funny passage, I always remember the moments where I laughed out loud, then glanced around the room to see if anyone noticed.

Plus, this is an election year. Who can't use a laugh when it comes to Washington D.C... Am I right? Don't fear the presence of political thought in Devin Briar, because there simple isn't one. My story is about two people who do all they can to survive in our pithy little Nation's capital.

Humorous books are great for airline flights too, but when you read Devin Briar on a plane you need to keep the chuckling to a minimum. The flight attendants will stop serving you those little bottles of booze if you don't, not to mention there may be a grumpy Air Marshal too.

Review by: Jesse Kaellis on Aug. 19, 2012 :      Mr Morrison has written a fine book with engaging and unforgettable characters. He opened my eyes to new worlds. Ordinarily I don't read fiction but his characters were so finely drawn and nuanced as to seem real. I really felt that I was inside the hearts and minds of the protagonists in this fast paced read. This book is a page turner that you will find hard to put down. I'm looking forward to Mr Morrison's next novel, perhaps a sequel to Devin Briar.

5 of 5 people found the following review helpful5.0 out of 5 stars Surprisingly interesting August 13, 2012By ArmandoDouglas really shows his ability's in this novel. I bought this for my kindle fire and was hooked since the first chapter. The characters seem to connect with each other well. I definitely will be recommending this title to family and friends.

 Hilarious Read! August 14, 2012By Miss Bailey   5.0 out of 5 stars Getting into this book was so easy due to the characters chemistry and the attention grasping plot line! This book is beyond clever and I would highly recommend it to anyone who appreciates humor and excitement!

 Need a copy of Devin Briar for your iPad or iPhone?

The Best Way to Promote Your Book Has Little to Do with Twitter or Facebook

 Surprise! Devin Briar is doing some serious sales numbers, though not from the sites you may think. Amazon is trailing Smashword by a wide margin. Barnes & Noble is a distant 5th place. So how does a new author get the word out in today's publishing world? Let's face it, debut authors aren't exactly at the top of publisher's spending lists when it come to promotion these days...

One of the things I've done was purely by accident. I have been writing articles for SBNation/Vox Media for the last couple years. Hard as it is to believe, there are actually people who read my articles and don't necessarily feel like I've stolen moments of their lives they'll never get back. If you haven't heard of SBNation, you will very soon. They are quite literally the fastest growing sports information site in the WORLD! 320 plus sites, and the number grows almost daily. Funds being rather small-ish for a debut author such as myself, SBNation created a huge - and I do mean HUGE - advertising campaign for my book - Devin Briar. I had over 20 million page-views of my Ads in just under two weeks BEFORE my book hit the marketplace, and that was just from the NFL and NCAA sites. BOOM!

I've received e-mails from around the world based on the Ads alone, plus I sold more than enough books to make a few genre specific best sellers lists. What's that you say? The Novel Road may have helped? Well, that's true to a point. But what I REALLY found interesting is that not only did my book's sale links get pounded to the point of giving me a toothy smile, but SBNation also linked everything to The Novel Road too. Traffic here hit all time highs to view my book's short description.

This is all to say the way to get the word out shouldn't be limited to things like Twitter and Facebook. Doing a bit of writing for sites like SBNation can be an unbelievable way to build a successful reader foundation too. Think about it for a second: Don't you want to have a ready made clientele who's familiar with your writing style across a broad spectrum of subjects BEFORE you launch your book?

While it's true SBNation is sports oriented, there are other sites looking for front page copy. My current writing resume features links to over 300 front page articles I've written for SBNation, and they contain some decent comment totals. I've posted articles on virtually every NFL teams' site. Check out the cities that have NFL teams. When you think about markets for your book, the NFL covers virtually every market, and not in just the U.S. "But they don't cover L.A. you say?" Wrong! They cover the L.A. Lakers, Dodgers, Kings, Angels; plus they cover college sports, so some extremely nice folks hammered the USC and UCLA sites for me. They have every NCAA division I school covered too, so reaching a broad demographic is so easy it should be outlawed. You want to know the best part? My book isn't about sports. Everything I've done for SBNation has sold people that I can write, and they want to see more...

Why am I telling you all this? The point I'm trying to make is you need to create a viable marketplace for your book. The only way you can do it effectively is to write. Write articles outside your comfort zone if you must, but you gain potential readers with every word you type. Relying on the hope you'll separate yourself from others in the cloud on Twitter is a pipe dream. Tweet a thousand times a day, and you still will not have proven to anyone you can write more than 140 characters. Facebook is nothing without the ability to back up your neat little page that looks like a thousand others.

Going to writer's conferences is fantastic, but don't you think the publishers and agents you may meet would be thrilled to talk to someone who has a broad writing resume? They want people who have proven ability to produce, so isn't the fact you write front page articles on a daily basis the easiest way to prove it? While it's true a great many writers for publications never write a book, you'll be able to prove the inverse is true. A novelist can write articles in massive amounts, and it speaks volumes about what you're capable of down the road after signing.

For those that say they don't have the time it takes to write articles, I say you're fooling yourself. I wrote an article just yesterday for the St. Louis Rams in 45 minutes, and these articles can be written at any time of day and scheduled to post later. It received around 1500 reads in an hour before it past on from the front page, and that was a low read number for my articles on average. Just for the sake of argument,  multiply that number by 300. Now this is on the low side for me, but it still adds up to 450,000 people reading the articles. The great part is, that same article is still being read, so the 1500 number is probably 5 times that high today, and it will grow each day since my articles are linked to Sports Illustrated, USA Today, ESPN, CBS Sports, NBC Sports, and every other sports news outlet because of SBNation's growing power.

You can't write sports stories? Remember, I mentioned that you may need to write outside your comfort zone? I've actually written fiction based article for sports sites. These sites love getting different kinds of articles to show diversity of content. Have a look at this, this and this, then tell me you can't write something similar for another site? The kind of writing I'm talking about shows your character, your humor, and your imagination. The only way you can show the world you are in fact a writer - and not just a dreamer of Rowling-esk success - is to prove it.

For those of you who'd like to write about sports, drop me an e-mail and I'll find a site for you. Whatever you do, don't lock your dream of being a novelist to only social media. Yes, Twitter and Facebook are powerful players in the broad scheme, but they can't compare with a following you've created, and own, due to the articles you've written.

P.S. - A big thank you to J. Pearsall for creating all the pictures for this post from his fertile imagination!

Devin Briar Book Launch! Today's the Day!

Hello from the land of the lost author!

August 14th is a huge day for me and my novel Devin Briar. SBNation has been absolutely the best, and has plastering Ads all over the place. Why I'm writing you is to ask a favor, well three favors actually. The first is that I hope you'll take the gamble and buy my book. It's available in paperback and e-book in any format you can imagine.

If you would like a Amazon paperback copy, go here!  

If Amazon Kindle is your thing, this link will take care of you: Go Here! 

Barnes & Noble you say? Well have a look here!

Apple iBookstore? Well here you go!  

Every other possible format you can think of? Go here!

Being a writer and editor at TST is something I truly love doing. While the other authors on the site have regular day jobs, I make my living off of writing. If Devin Briar is successful, I will not only be able to give the Yugo the paint job it longs for, but I'll actually be able to eat too. Not to mention the whole "roof over my head" thing.

So favor two is I'd really appreciate you taking the time to hit the "review" box when you buy the book. Just in case you didn't know, the five star rating will guarantee you long life, health, happiness, wealth and beer...Lots of beer! The 1 star rating is actually God's test to see who goes to hell. If you click on it, you're destined to spend an eternity in a fiery place with people like Hitler, The Son of Sam, Leona Helmsley, and DCRamFan (special ring of hell, where beer is just out of reach). So please throw a rating on my book. It means more than you know to my future as an author.

The third favor - I hope this isn't a favor too far - I need you to get the word out on my book any way you can. Whether using Twitter, Facebook or yelling out the window, this kind of first person "word of mouth" advertising is the most highly prized of all. This is the make or break kind of advertising I'm desperately in need of finding and have happen. Tell your softball team, bowling team, parole officer or wife... Tell anyone you can think of that'll let you within the 100 foot restraining order limits. If you do, I'll turn you on to a website that offers Lottery Insurance... No really... 

So there they are - the three things I'd ask as a favor. I know you'll enjoy my novel, simply because  it's funny and won't take up all that much gray matter when you read it. It's currently been nominated for the New Mexico Book Award, and my Mom says it's great. Just so you know, my Mom hates pretty much everything, and after she read Devin Briar, she actually remembered my name. Can't put a price on that, eh?

So buy like the wind. If you buy multiple copies, I'm told the story turns into a 3D movie with YOU as the primary character opposite ______ (insert hot co-star name here)

All the very best to you and yours,

DouglasM